As deep as your horoscope, I think!
The word “Love” has fired the minds of generations of poets, artists, singers, painters, dancers. We have songs and dramas set on the theme of undying love, love at first sight, star crossed lovers, love ending in tragedy, passionate love, platonic love and so on.
Astrologically love though is very different. There are two houses in the horoscope, the 5th and the 7th which play an important role in deciding our “love life”.
Today there is a fashion for young men and women fall in and out of love in a snap. This is in the domain of the 5th house of the horoscope. This emotion is not love, but more properly infatuation, a crush. The 5th house is the house of expressing creativity. The most creative emotion for a particular age group is then “falling in love. And we have our TV shows and popular culture to blame in part. Going out for a movie and a dinner then engaging in physical relations is now considered to be love, where it could in fact be lust. It is your 5th house working. This is more self-centered and both concentrate on their personal satisfaction.
Then we have the 7th house of the horoscope which determines the partnerships in your life. The most important one is obviously that of the life partner. So 7th house is also the house of marriage. The instant you and your husband/wife go around the marriage homam fire seven times with the intention of marriage this house gets operational. Now you and your husband/wife are bound deeply with each others karma. Both your 7th house placements and the placements of Venus, Jupiter and Mars now start affecting each other. If in his horoscope the 7th house lord is placed in his 12th house, the health of the woman who has married him will suffer irrespective of how strong her own horoscope is. If her own horoscope is well balanced the diseases will be mild but still she cannot escape the influence of his horoscope. On the other hand if some woman’s 7th house lord is placed in her 11th house, whoever marries her will be a very lucky man. His luck and fortunes will start rising spectacularly after the marriage.
We Indians call the wife “Dharmapatni” and the husband “Dharmapati”. It means the wife/husband who helps us in carrying out our actions as per the Dharma. Now Dharma means a lot of things but basically it is about completing our karmic debts in a manner acceptable to our own conscience/antaratma.
The shift of karma after marriage can be so intense that sometimes the the 9th divisional chart can get more important than the main birth chart, completely changing the individual. Sometimes you get to see this, after marriage some persons change 180degrees, get more serious, completely wrapped up in the husbands family, etc it is rare now but yes if you observe there are examples.
So it is very important to remember that your girlfriend/boyfriend is your 5th house and your wife/husband is the 7th house of the horoscope. For example, suppose your 5th house is in a very good shape and you get the girlfriend of your dreams, so you date for a bit then get married but then everything collapses! Why? You blame each other and everyone around you, but the real reason is in the horoscope. The 7th house was afflicted with malefic influences. You blame her that she changed after marriage! She did not, the relationship and the factors controlling that relationship changed from a well placed 5th house to a 7th house under malefic influence.
Another curious thing, suppose he has a nicely balanced 7th house but she has a 7th affected by malefic influences. So now both have different perceptions regarding their marriage. He feels that his wife is the best thing that ever happened to him and she utterly dislikes her married life and if extreme may get into extramarital affairs or file for divorce. And he is all unknowing and happy with her. You do see such examples around you. These are all the horoscope combinations at work.
So now, If your 7th house has problems, not get married forever? No, not marrying is not acceptable, as you miss having a life partner who can actively help you complete your karma. And you too help her. Or then there are situations, after getting married you both cannot adapt to the changes. So for such cases, there are astrological remedies prescribed. The easiest one is to recite the Srisukta. (the first 16 verses are the srisukta)
But there is one category of individual for whom not getting married is allowed. Those horoscopes with very potent interactions of Ketu, Shukra, Bruhaspati, where negligible pending karma is indicated. These individuals get ‘married’ to their deity/philosophy/spiritual practice. These individuals from a very young age display signs of being indifferent to worldly attachments and may even take sanyas or live their lives in deep solitude and active meditation/dhyan. These horoscopes have the possibility of moksha in them.
For all the rest of us, we have to go through the highs and lows of the 7th house with our life partner. And your regular practice of Srisukta. May Shri Laxmi bless your marriage.
And finally as Doctor Who says, “Love”, Love is not an emotion, Love is a promise!”