Spare the rod and spoil the child? Really?

I really wish everyone learns to see auras, its easier than learning to analyse horoscopes.

A small (perhaps) incident. A few years ago.

One of my clients had a small 3yr old son, cute, behaviour was as per his age, no big problems, no tantrums. My client had married against the wishes of his mother. Naturally she disliked his wife. And whenever she would come over to stay at his house, his son would misbehave, screaming, crying, out of control behaviour, very agitated. Then the MIL would scold her DIL saying ‘you are not a good mother’!

I had gone to meet up with his mother, a social call. The child was misbehaving terribly, screaming at his mother, and rather than coming to meet me as ‘Auntie!’, he came and spat on me. His dad was furious and was going to beat him.

But the reality was something very very different. The child was not being rude, he just was agitated beyond control. See, the child would play with his grandmom, she would give him his food, take care of him, sleep next to him in the afternoon etc while his parents went to work. A doting grandmom, no issues at all, she actually loved him. But her aura was still so full of anger at her son and her DIL for getting married against her wishes. The auras of the three were actually fighting. The client and the DIL were not aware of this, were just generally uneasy around her. Whenever they got within 2 feet of each other, the auras would send out flares of rage and all sorts of negative stuff! (sometimes auras are really not pleasant to see).

The MIL’s illogical rage and frustration had spoilt the energy of the house. And the poor child was caught in this wild storm of negative auras! The MIL was being with him, taking care of him but unconsciously passing on her feelings through auras! And children are most sensitive to the astral, subconscious etc! No wonder he was misbehaving, he had gone mad with all the aura-conflicts around him.childJust look at the kind of energies we are exposing our children to! The television is garbage, movies are full of negative stuff. We give them mobiles and the internet which spoils their eyes and expose them to age-inappropriate ideas and behaviour. The schools they go to, what kind of education do they get there? Overstressed with school-work and home-work! And the quality of education has also dropped. The food we give them is full of pesticides. The houses we keep them in are cramped, we cut them off from nature. Our cities are full of sound, which tears into their auras. There are just so many things going wrong.

And then us. We are exposing our children to our energies. I wish everyone looks into their own aura sometime. Frustration, tiredness, fear, negativity in our auras, our children are drinking it all in! We don’t give them time. We don’t enjoy their company! Most children are living a life of trauma caused by the intense negativity around them. Hitting them would be the worst thing that anyone can do!

A lot of these problems with children can be resolved if we add pran/vital energy to their energy-starved lives. Sitting in the early morning sunlight, massage by ayurvedic oils, fresh fruits/salads in the diet, listening to Sanskrit high energy mantra. Going for day visits or vacations in places of natural energy, seaside, forests etc where the air is rich in pran (Pine forests have the highest pran levels). Performing the Agnihotra is compulsory for all Hindus, its vibhuti is very high energy. (My son eats it all the instant the homa cools down, but if I have been distracted during the homa, he also points out that the vibhuti’s energy was low).

And the most important, if it is a boy-child, Upanayan/Yadnopavit must be performed at the age of 6yrs. And he should be encouraged to do regular Gayatri mantra puja. For a girl child, she does not need to wear a yadnopavit, on her 6th birthday she should be taught the Gayatri and she should also do Gayatri puja, at least recite it (27 or 54 or 108 times) every day in the morning and evening. Gayatri is the right of every human. It increases the mental stability and intelligence and is the most valuable gift you can give him/her, the foundation of his/her life-time’s spiritual practice. And the parents too, recite the Gayatri along with the child, give yourself these 10 mins in the morning and the evening, your own personal energy quality will improve. (When the age of 7yrs is complete, the chakras of the child stop being so receptive to external influences.)

Why would a child misbehave? It is not normal behaviour, it is a response to something going wrong with him. Find out what is going wrong and change it for the better, this is the parent’s responsibility. Children represent the ‘creativity’ and divine intelligence of the parents in every way possible.

I can never condone hitting a child. Scolding is one thing, but physically hitting or verbally abusing cannot be justified. Maybe I am too idealistic, but we are adults, so should be wiser, more analytical and more understanding? Children copy us. And because we are human too, if we do lash out in anger, we should be sensible enough to make up and reassure the child before it causes a permanent negative impact on his psyche. (I have seen several of my grown-up clients carrying childhood scars of negligent parents, it is very difficult to resolve them later in life.)

childAnd yes, there are children who are neglected by their parents, perhaps beaten up or abandoned or put in hostels and orphanages. There are several combinations which show neglect by the father and by the mother. The astrological combinations would be related to the 4th house/ruler or 10th house/ruler or the Sun or the Moon being damaged by malefics in the child’s chart. If it is physical hurt then the birth chart D-1 will show the damage and if the torture is more emotional, the chart seen from the birth moon’s sign will have the indications.

If small children are misbehaving, first analyse the behaviour of the parents and the child’s environment. From the astrological point of view the Dasha of the child and the parents should also be analysed. (Gandant nakshatra births often go through a difficult childhood.)

If grown ups abuse and neglect their parents, then such parents would have a damaged 5th house/ruler and from what examples I have seen, their own Sun /Moon and 9th house/ruler would be afflicted too. And their own charts would show combinations of parental neglect during childhood.

But all things considered, a child is precious. We all may not be able to afford a lot of things for our children but two things we can do. One is to hug the child, tell him/her that he is the most loved one in the Universe, really mean it (remember he can see auras better than you). And the second is to gift him with ‘faith’ (spiritual practice, Gayatri), let him know that someone is always there, looking out for him. This brings in Hope, the ability to withstand the challenges that life is going to throw at him.

And my client’s child? He went back to his usual sweet self after his grandmom went back to her own house after staying for 1 month. The next time I saw him, he sat on my lap and showed me a drawing he had made.

 

child(This post was in response to this comment I received in the comments form. “I have seen small children in my area hitting their parents with lot of angst and the parents stand helplessly. Are there any combinations of children physically abusing parents no matter what their age. I happened to read an article by E Sreedharan -“Metro Man” talking about parenting. He mentioned that children from the age of 4 should be disciplined with corporal punishment. He believes in “Spare the rod and spoil the child”. What is your take on this…..”)

Dharma Trikon of the horoscope.

The 12 houses of the horoscope are divided into the Dharma Trikon, houses 1, 5 and 9. The Arth Trikon houses 2, 6 and 10. The Kama Trikon of houses 3, 7 and 11 and the Moksh Trikon houses 4, 8 and 12.brown house surrounded by snow covered field near snow covered mountain under yellow blue and orange sunsetEvery human needs these 4 categories of activities to live a reasonably comfortable and happy life. These are Sanskrit words so have layers of meanings and cannot be translated exactly. However, broadly Dharma is the foundation of your life, from the physical environments to the spiritual principles and the deepest understanding of these. Arth is all the hoards, the income, finances and wealth, all the assets and treasuries that you build up on ever level the physical, emotional spiritual etc, and also your understanding of these. Kama is the all the desires that you have, desires ranging from company of friends, interaction with the society, with the spouse and to being with your own Self. These desires also operate on all levels. And finally Moksh, the closure of every aspect of this life, the ultimate understanding of each aspect and also the foundations that you lay down in the astral which will serve as the seeds of your next life experience.

Dharm trikon/triangle is the three houses, 1, 5 and 9 and the aspects of your life that they indicate. Here you decide your personal dharma/Swadharma. (The universal Dharma is called Rita). You choose what is right for you, the right social context, the right creativity and the right philosophies.

The First House

The 1st natural house of the zodiac is Aries, and its ruler Mars, so Aries and Mars wherever they may be located will have a subtle influence on the matters of the 1st house, in addition the actual sign and its planetary ruler.

The 1st house is the house of your personality, the energy of your physical manifestation, the beauty of your face, your skin, complexion, the proportions of your body. Your physical appearance the muscle strength the vitalness, the competitive energies, basically the force of your personality expressed in every way possible. The energies of the Annamaya-kosha, the layer of your body which is visible to the eyes are the 1st house or the ascendant. The 1st house also has its say on how your body and mind can enjoy what is available to you. Do you permit yourself the capacity to enjoy pleasure or pain! Do you have significant personal integrity? Also are you honorable and dependable? This house lays the foundation of your physical life. This is the house of beginnings and the potential that you derive from your birth. Your birth circumstances, social status and the role you are expected to perform in the society. The experience of your early childhood. All of this is connected to the assets you have accumulated in your immediate past life.

How you feel about your social position? Do you actively work to improve it or damage it further? How do others treat you as a matter of routine? Is your voice heard in your social setting? Social ranking is also related to material accomplishment and contributes to your ego. Thus what society thinks of you, determines your quality of life experiences.

This house is counted 5th from the 9th house, thus is the expression of the guidance and philosophies that you have chosen for yourself and guided in this by your Guru, paternal figures, patrons and peers. It is the 9th from the 5th house so is the summation of the deeper understanding of your own creative forces and your active use of them.

Ultimately you desire social validation and use your physical attributes to compete, this lays the foundation of your social personality. The domain of the 1st house.pexels-photo-42240.jpegThe Fifth House

This is the house of your creative expressions. The natural zodiac sign here is Leo, ruled by the Sun. So Leo and Sun wherever they may be located will have a subtle influence on the matters of the 5th house.

You are known by your actions, you maybe famous or notorious, both are expressions of your personal creative actions. You will be made visible through your behaviour e.g. a leader with power or performing arts like dances, theatre, musical compositions. Or you will be made visible by your channelising of abstract divine intelligence, your scholarship, publications drawing, painting and writing. This is the house of being Visible, the natural ruler is the Sun!

The 5th also indicates your higher education. Training in skills, practice and preparation. guidance from parents and teachers, personal focus and also your confidence which comes from a secure childhood environment. And then the capacity to think and to convert what you been taught into new actions. All this provides you a platform for your accomplishments which will be then recognised socially.

Another function of the 5th is to create new ways of using information/intelligence and also drive the society as such to a newer understanding of civilisation. Also to create new children who will live in this newer version of civilisation.

(One point to be noted here. I have seen charts with auspicious placements concerning 5th house but having no children. The more powerful this house is, the more will you be inclined to use its energies for high art, high intellectual expression, superb performances, or great spiritual/political leaderships, rather than producing children from your own physical body. If you observe, genuine and great achievers in any field (artists/leaders/sadhus/etc) have no or limited physical children, if they have any they will engage nannies to take care of them.)

This house is the 5th from the 1st house, thus obviously is the creative expression of the personality. It is also the 9th from the 9th, thus is the foundation of auspiciousness and all sorts of fortune/Bhagya in the horoscope.

This is the house of your speculative creativity and its resultant fame. The Glory of your Ego.pexels-photo-826345.jpegThe Ninth House

This is the theoretical basis of your life, here you choose the creed you live by here. The natural zodiac sign here is Sagittarius, ruled by Jupiter. So Sagittarius and Jupiter wherever they may be located will have a subtle influence on the matters of the 9th house.

Your belief system which has developed out of your own creative processes and the religious system that you relate you.The paternal figures whom you choose and really respect as a father-figure (Biological father is the 10th house, you do not have a choice in this). This is the house of the Guru, the one who teaches you wisdom. (Modern education is not about wisdom, it is more the 3rd house). The help and support that the society will give you, your peers and patrons and the elders who help you further your place in society.

The philosophies which are your own (the ideas you were trained in are seen from the 4th house). The ancestral wisdom that derives from the ancestors of your current life and the wisdom you have garnered throughout your own past lives. This is the house of sustained study, deep contemplation and the intention of Dharma. You want to know the deepest possible in the domain of study here which may not have any direct practical application but is the foundation of all your mental processes. Your moral wisdom, your sense of humanity and your associations with similarly philosophical persons and institutions. Your understanding of the divine-human association is the 9th.

Your Bhagya/auspiciousness. The 9th house indicates the best of the best associations that you have created for yourself.pexels-photo-774283.jpegAll the 4 types of trikons are based on creative expressions. Example, in the Dharma trikon, the 5th is the creative expression of the 1st, the 9th is the creative expression of the 5th and the 1st is again the creative expression of the 9th. Each house is counted 5th from the other. This is true for all the trikons. All the 4 types of trikons are also based on philosophies and deepest understandings. Example, the Dharma trikon, 9th is counted 9th from the 1st, the 5th is counted 9th from the 9th and the 1st is counted 9th from the 5th. Thus they are the deepest understanding and philosophical depths of each other.

In horoscope analysis this 5-9 axis is very important. For analysing every house do take into account the placement 5th and 9th from it. These represent the conversion of all the manifested/subtle assets of that house into new visible creative expressions. These visible actions are then again analysed with newer ways of thinking and converted to deep philosophies. And these deep philosophies are then manifested in the physical realm. This cycle is the cycle of evolution and growth for every house and thus the entire personality.

 

photography of houses during winter